A belief is an idea we feel is true. We have beliefs in every context of our lives—work, love, money, spirituality, etc. Beliefs run our lives—they determine what we think is right and wrong, what is possible or impossible. They guide us in what we’re willing to do, or not do.

Beliefs are potent. Whatever you believe, will somehow show up as true for you. For example, if you believe that people hate salespeople, you will find plenty of supporting evidence and you will attract circumstances that are in line with your belief. You’ll likely receive negative responses when you sell and you may choose to avoid selling altogether. On the other hand, if you believe that your product or service is excellent, that people really need it, and you’re the one to help them get it, you will attract positive responses that align with your belief.

We’ve identified ten common disempowering beliefs that stifle professionals in their efforts to grow their business. We call them bogus beliefs. Pay close attention: Having even one of these bogus beliefs is a mental roadblock to attracting and achieving what you want.

Bogus Belief #1 - I’m not in sales.

Selling is a process of influencing someone to buy, do, or accept something. Everyone is selling something—a product, a service, an idea, or advice. Every conversation that requires any form of convincing is a selling conversation. If you’re responsible for growing your own business and you believe you’re not in sales, you’re in denial.

Countless professionals dissociate themselves from the idea of sales because they believe it’s somehow sleazy or beneath them. Some are even ashamed to sell. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with sales, per se. The problem is how some people relate to the idea of selling or how they choose to sell. Selling is essential—it helps people get what they need, it builds businesses, fuels the economy, and puts food on the table.

If you believe you’re not in sales, it’s time to let that belief go. You are in sales, so accept it. Better still, embrace it, watch what happens to your business growth, and notice the opportunities you attract.

Bogus Belief #2 - Selling is manipulative.Manipulate means “to influence or manage shrewdly or deviously.”* If your intent is to influence someone to buy, regardless of what they need or want, that’s manipulation. If your intent is to discover what someone needs or wants and help them get it or provide a solution for them, that’s ethical selling.

Selling is a way of connecting your solution or product to someone who needs it. If your intent and approach are about creating a win-win, you can dispel this erroneous belief. Some sellers may be choose to be manipulative, but not you.

Bogus Belief #3 - I’m not good at sales because I wasn’t born that way.

Some people seem to have a gift for selling. They’re likeable, charismatic, and easily influence others. We call them “natural-born salespeople.” The assumption is that great salespeople are born, not bred.

Actually, great salespeople are bred—they’ve learned their people skills and the art of influence by modeling others, sometimes early in life, sometimes later.

Though selling may come easier to some people, it’s a skill anyone can learn. Regardless of what business you’re in, if you want to bring in more business you owe it to yourself to improve your selling skills. If you don’t have an effective sales process, you’re undoubtedly losing business that you could otherwise have.

Bogus Belief #4 - To be successful, I have to sell myself.

If you have this belief, you’ll approach selling conversations focused on yourself, rather than on your prospects’ needs. People that sell themselves tend to assume their prospects’ needs, rather than identifying the real needs.

As we point out in Sell the Feeling, people buy based on feelings, especially trust, confidence, and a feeling of being cared for. People who focus on themselves in selling have a hard time creating the feelings of trust and care with their prospects.

Instead of focusing on yourself and what you need or want to project, zero in on your prospects and what they need. It’s not about you—it’s about the person in front of you. To be successful, don’t sell yourself—sell the feeling.

Bogus Belief # 5 - My product or service sells itself.

When was the last time you saw a product or service stand up on the table and say, “Buy me!”? No matter how good your product or service is, people decide whether to do business with you based on how they feel—about your product or service AND you.

Has a competitor ever gotten business that you felt should have been yours? After all, your product or service is better, right? Chances are your competitor won the business because he created the feelings of trust, confidence, and care.

Here’s an example from Phil’s experience: I once consulted with a highly regarded attorney about planning my estate. He was one of the top people in his field and even though I was sure he could do a good job, he was aloof and I just didn’t feel good about him. After a little more searching, I hired another attorney who knew how to make me and my wife feel listened to and cared for. Though both attorneys were highly competent, I chose the one who gave me the better feeling.

Many professionals think they don’t need to trouble with creating rapport and selling. They feel that their knowledge and expertise are enough to bring customers or clients in the door. If this sounds like you, keep in mind that there are always competitors who practice the skills of sales and influence and would gladly take the business you leave behind because of a lack of salesmanship.

Remember: For people to want to do business with you, they need to experience the feelings of trust, confidence, and care and have those feeling linked to your product or service.

Bogus Belief #6 - To be successful at selling, I have to be able to withstand lots of rejection.

How did you conclude that a decline of your offer or proposal is a rejection of you?

All rejection in sales is self-rejection—that’s right, self-rejection. Rejection is an interpretation of events and exists only in your own mind. Someone may decline your offer or decide not to buy your product or service, but how is that a rejection of you personally? People who anticipate rejection have already rejected themselves inside and are constantly auditioning for validation of their self-worth. As Eleanor Roosevelt once said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

If you struggle with the fear of rejection, listen to your internal conversation. What are you saying about yourself and the outcome of the transaction, before, during, and after the sales conversation? Notice whether you anticipate negative outcomes and the meaning you make up in your head when someone says no.

It’s not the no that’s the problem—it’s what you do with it in your head and the action (or lack of action) you take as a result. When someone says no, get your ego out of the way and either root out the objection or move on to the next prospect.

Bogus Belief #7 - People always buy based on price.

Rubbish! If this were so, only businesses that offer the lowest price would still be in business. Quality of price is only one of three criteria that influence a buying decision. There’s also quality of product, and quality of service. In most cases, people focus on two of these three criteria when making their decision.

People buy based on feelings. Even when someone’s most important criteria is price, they still need to feel good about their buying decision; otherwise, they may experience buyer’s remorse, return the product, or cancel the service.

Bogus Belief #8 - Success in selling is strictly a numbers game—the more contacts I make the more sales I’ll get.

People who think sales is a numbers game advocate making as many contacts as possible to increase the odds of landing business. This numbers-game mentality reduces the art of selling to random, inefficient activity. It’s like hurling a giant handful of darts at a dartboard in hopes that one or more will hit the bulls-eye.

The point isn’t the number of contacts—it’s the number of contacts you convert to closed business. The way to raise your closing percentage is to raise the quality of your interactions and sell the feeling in each conversation.

We recently worked with a financial advisor who pushed himself to make 50 phone contacts a day seeking to make appointments. He focused solely on the number—he considered anything less than 50 a failure. He was able to set an average of 1.5 appointments per day. We coached him to get off the numbers game and instead focus on creating the feelings of trust, confidence, and care in every call. Over a four-week period he averaged about half as many calls as before, but he increased the average number of appointments he set each day from 1.5 to 3.5. Once he met with his prospects he continued to sell the feeling. His closing ratio went up over 45%.  

The moral: It’s not the quantity, but the quality, of the interactions that counts.

Bogus Belief #9 - Objections are a sign that I’m losing the sale—I should avoid them at all cost.

Quite the contrary—objections are valuable clues. They let you know what you need to resolve to move the prospect to a buying decision.

Avoiding objections is like walking into a dark cluttered room without a light. You don’t know what’s there or how to get from one end of the room to the other without tripping on something. Flushing up objections is like shining a light on the objects in your way so you can find a path to your desired outcome.

Great salespeople welcome objections; they want to get the nos out of the way so they can get to yes. If you think of an objection as a deal-breaker, you’ll lose out to the salespeople who know how to handle objections masterfully.

The important thing is to listen carefully for objections and have strategies for handling them. We recommend you make a list of all the objections you’ve had difficulty handling and write out strategies for dealing with each.

Bogus Belief #10 - My business is down because of the market.

People frequently use “the down-market excuse” to justify their own mediocre results or as an excuse for not putting out 100% effort. We all know people who have prospered greatly in a down market, while others complain that the market is killing them.

Remember: what you believe you will make true. If you believe that your sales are inextricably linked to market cycles, you will certainly create the results you expect. Dare to think beyond the current market conditions. Don’t follow the herd of complainers and naysayers. Someone always wins in a down market. Why shouldn’t it be you?

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There you have it: the top ten bogus beliefs of selling. Remember: if you have even one of these beliefs, it can have a significant negative impact on your business growth. Pay attention to what you think and believe—your mentality creates your reality. To learn more about how creating a positive selling experience and closing more and more business, read Sell the Feeling: The 6-Step System that Drive Business to You.