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The Power of the Tongue - Watch the Words You Use

Written by Chris Widener

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Bad Habits Die Hard

A habit is defined as a pattern of behavior that is followed regularly until it becomes automatic. In other words we do things we are comfortable with and we keep doing them. When we do the same thing over and over again an amazing thing happens: we get the same result over and over again!

It's reality. Salespeople fail. Maybe even you. Sadly, thousands of salespeople are fired or quit each day because they failed to attain quota. When you ask these salespeople what went wrong most are quick to point out that their failure was due to some external factor, which prevented them from achieving their goal. Poor territories, bad managers, difficult environments, lack of training, and defective products are fodder for these conversations.

However, when studying successful Sales Professionals in those same organizations, we find, that when faced with identical difficulties, they still managed to succeed. Why did some salespeople succeed where others didn't?

The answer is simple. The successful salespeople have developed the habit of looking inward for inspiration, motivation, and accountability when things get difficult. They have developed the disciplined habit of finding solutions to problems while the less successful people have developed the habit of finding excuses for failure. I'm sure for some this seems a bit harsh, but the truth is the truth. Success or failure has a lot more to do with our thoughts and actions than the difficulties we face.

A habit is defined as a pattern of behavior that is followed regularly until it becomes automatic. In other words we do things we are comfortable with and we keep doing them. When we do the same thing over and over again an amazing thing happens: we get the same result over and over again!

Unfortunately, many people become so comfortable with their habits that they will continue the behavior even if that habit is causing them to fail. This is called a bad habit and anyone who has worked to quit smoking or even correct a poor golf swing, will attest that bad habits die hard. In many ways, failure is just the manifestation of our bad habits.

Stepping out of a comfort zone is very difficult and one of the core reasons so many salespeople find themselves moving from company to company and failing time and time again. Despite the training each new company provides, despite the coaching, despite the mentoring from successful Sales Professionals, eventually these salespeople revert back to their old habits and ultimately failure. The good news is, that though difficult, it is possible to break this cycle of failure. But to change your habits, you must first change your thoughts and actions. And who has control of your thoughts and actions? You.

Four PowerPrinciples for Positive Change

Identify Your Bad Habits: The first step to creating new, winning habits is identifying your bad habits and examining and understanding your behavior. In this process you must be honest with yourself. You must place the responsibility for your failure where it lies.

Harness Your Desire: The next step is to mentally make the status quo untenable. As long as you are more comfortable with where you are than where you want to be it will be difficult, if not impossible to change. To make positive changes you must harness your desire. That means defining what you want, writing it down, and becoming laser focused on that goal. A burning desire to achieve a defined goal is the one key that unlocks the door to the formation of powerful new habits.

Invest in Your Mind: Just because you want to change, need to change, and desire to change doesn't mean that you have the skills to change. Thanks to the Internet and sites like www.SalesGravy.com you can now browse the minds of millions of individuals with the click of a mouse, instantly. There are thousands of books written about success, sales, and self help. There are also Podcasts, eZines, printed magazines, and seminars. Take every opportunity to learn new skills that will lead you to new habits.

Get a Coach: Perhaps the most powerful step you can take towards positive change in your life is to get a coach. There are coaches everywhere and, as long as you are coachable, a great coach will help you break through your self-imposed barriers and will illuminate the path that will lead you straight to the success you deserve.

There is an old proverb with a lot of wisdom. It says, “The tongue has the power of life and death, and whoever loves it will eat its fruit.”

It is so true. What we say has the ability to create situations, emotions, and thoughts in others. A kind word helps people, negative words hurt – sometimes for a very long time.

Most of the time we think of this concept in relation to how we treat others and that is good. In fact, I wrote an article in the last month or so called “The Power of Praising People.” If you missed it, you can get it at the website.

But here I want to talk about this concept in relation to ourselves. How does what we say affect us? Tremendously. There is a simple principle here. Only say things that will create in you positive emotions, thoughts, feelings, and ultimately, actions.

Let me give you a good example. We do not allow the words “I can’t” in our house. Why? Because we CAN! The very minimum is “I’ll try.” We ask our kids to say “I’ll try.” If we allow our kids, or ourselves, to fall into the trap of saying “I can’t,” guess what? We won’t! And that’s not good, is it?

Do you tell yourself negative thoughts during the day? Most of us can fall into that temptation, can’t we? I was working the other day and I was brewing over something bad that had happened and I was just getting bent out of shape. So I stopped, realized I had the power to choose what I was saying to myself and began to think about and tell myself good things. And my day changed for the better.

Have you ever been in your backswing on the golf course and said to yourself, “I am going to shank this one.” What happens? You shank it. This actually happens to me. So what do I do? I stop my backswing, reset myself, and tell myself I am going to hit it straight down the fairway. What happens? About half the time I hit it straight, the other half, I shank it, but increasing your ability is a future article! At the very least I increase my chances of performing better. Bad thoughts almost guarantee my failure, while good thoughts increase my chances for success dramatically.

A salesman may see someone walk through his door and say to himself, “I’m not going to be able to make this sale.” I can’t. I won’t.

Some of us aren’t even aware that we talk negatively to ourselves. Take some time today to think about what you say to yourself. Maybe ask a close friend if you have this habit. If you find yourself doing this, it is time to change!

Now, don’t get me wrong. Self-talk is not a substitute for effort and ability, but it is a strong helping factor. Find some simple phrases that will help you get through the day with more success. Whatever your situation or work is, I am sure there are specific things you can say that will build you up and stick you on the road to success!

The words that you use and the conversations you have with yourself create things in you. They can create positive things or negative things. It is our choice. The tongue has the power of life and death. This is why it is so important to be diligent in using the power of the tongue to create a positive force in our lives.

Remember, your tongue has power. Use it!

Chris Widener
		About the author:
		Chris Widener is a popular speaker and author who has shared the podium with US Presidents, helping individuals and organizations turn their potential into performance, succeed in every area of their lives and achieve their dreams. Join subscribers in over 100 countries for a weekly leadership & success eZine by clicking here. Enjoy motivational audio programs from Chris Widener & other top speakers including Zig Ziglar & Brian Tracy by visiting www.MadeForSuccess.net. .